It's probably no secret that I hate mother's day. I think it's a stupid Hallmark holiday meant for people to splurge on flowers and candy and gifts for their moms. Okay, maybe I'm just bitter....but in my defense, I feel the same way about Valentine's Day. You shouldn't need a designated day of the year to tell the ones you love how much they mean to you, it should really be every day. Holidays like this just make people feel bad when they don't have a signifiant other/mother/father in their life to spend the day with.
Usually, for me this day is spent alone {avoiding church services where the moms get flowers...it always left me feeling awkward} sulking, and reminiscing about the short but wonderful time I had with my mom, and lamenting the days ahead that she won't get to be a part of. But really as backwardly referenced above, it's not just this day; it's pretty much every day. It's just that this particular day is more like a slap in the face every time I get to be constantly reminded that I don't have a mother, with TV commercials, Facebook Posts, and the casual acquaintance (usually a patient) asking the innocent, "What are you getting your mom for mother's day?" "Oh, ummm, I'm not sure yet...." {Quickly changes subject}.
But this year was different. I managed to keep a smile while all the moms at church were acknowledged for simply being alive; and I kept it all afternoon having family time at Colin's mom's house. Thankfully, they are such a low key and easy family, and really wonderful to be around. They always make me feel right at home and such a part of the family! After we finished lunch I actually forgot it was mother's day for a little bit :) But once we got home, I couldn't keep it all in and Colin knew I was hurting. He was so loving and gentle and cuddled me until he had to leave for his Sunday evening hockey game. He volunteered to make dinner after his game and asked me what I wanted. I half jokingly said through tears, "Chocolate cake". He smiled and got up to leave for hockey and left me to rest and take a nap. He left the house, but instead of going to his last championship game of the season, he went to the store and came back with pink tulips and all the ingredients for a home made chocolate cake. That sweet boy stood in the kitchen and made his first ever from scratch chocolate cake.
I've been without a mother for almost half of my life now, and I've grown quite used to ignoring and even loathing Mother's Day. But this year, I was given more love than I could imagine and had the best Mother's Day in 13 years. I don't know how I ever got so lucky, but I couldn't be more thankful for such a man who not only takes care of me, but truly goes out of his way to show me his love. God has truly been so kind to allow me to have the man of my dreams after 30 years of waiting. I'll never let a day go by without being thankful for the 17 short sweet years with such a wonderful mother, and hopefully the rest of my life with such a wonderful man by my side.
I love you, Colin Cox.
Colin, could a mom be more proud right now? I have always known that you had a heart of gold but this just seals it. Thank you for bringing so much joy to her difficult day. I know it was a hard day for you Vanessa and sometimes you wander if you should say anything...how silly is that?? I am so glad that you spent time with us!! Love you!
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